Everyone Calls Me Visceral
Everyone Calls Me Visceral
Tooth out, Stinking Headache and Scant Writing
I’ve never experienced writer’s block, but have the opposite which can lead to neglected, unfinished pieces. Then there’s the understandable overwhelm. Besides this, I’m prone to ridiculous expectations for myself set within the challenges of time. Believe me, there is a phenomenon called ‘Penny Time’, and perhaps it’s linked to my mental health and the hypersensitivity that is known to go with it. In practice, this means today I planned in slots of work – of writing, social media posting and even photo file organisation.
I struggled with the concept that my tooth extraction today might interfere with Penny Time, as similar situations have happened many times before. Perhaps the battle is my truculent inner child having a strop that some storytelling is likely to be interrupted.
A lot of heavy tugging after several numbing injections saw the tooth removed and my gum sewed up with a remarkable amount of thread. Now reality hits, I don’t feel that great, but the nagging, childish voice wants more of what brings the greatest pleasure.
The tooth extraction was a visceral experience – as the Cambridge Dictionary says, ‘based on deep feeling and emotional reactions rather than on reason or thought’. I would 100% say yes – no reason or thought here – as I dribbled blood, trying to process the after-care explained by the (exemplary) dental professionals. Viscera concerns entrails, and mine definitely took a turn when the tooth went pop.
My most magnificent, talented – and kindest – friend, Jake Arnott, was kind enough to write the quote below for First in the World Somewhere (available here and beyond). I rather like ‘a compelling visceral energy’. It’s not the first time the word has been applied to my work, but I feel it’s the most appropriate. Over the years, I’ve received a few backhanded compliments along the lines of my work being ‘gloriously over-rich’. Whilst I wouldn’t dare to compare myself to the unparalleled Angela Carter, I’m with her on this statement:
‘Okay, I write overblown, purple, self-indulgent prose. So fucking what?’
I’ve managed this Substack post rather well, I think, and expect lashings of post-extraction sympathy, particularly as a thumping headache is building. And in case you haven’t read my memoir, I’ll end by leaving Jake Arnott’s full quote below.
Be happy and love your purpose.
Penny x
'A wonderful memoir, this is the great untold tale of our times told with passion, humour and a compellingly visceral energy. Penny Pepper’s story is of a true struggle for liberation against the odds. Essential reading.'
Jake Arnott, best-selling British novelist and dramatist, author of The Long Firm and six other novels.
